Funny Quotes

Porsche is a driver's car - a performance car. That was funny - here's this awesome car, but it's got no cup holders.

My dad's really funny. The male sense of humor - like my grandfather's and such - is pretty bizarre. Basically my dad's side of the family is where the bizarreness comes from. It's a little goofy and a little out there.

When I first started as an editorial cartoonist, I was terrified on a daily basis. Filling that hole the next day, knowing that tens of thousands of people were going to expect something funny. There is still that pressure, but you kind of learn how to cope with it a little better.

A big part of becoming a funny person was a major defense mechanism. Onstage, especially as a woman, I've had to be really tough. The second you show a crack, the audience can literally leave.

I like clever lyrics, funny lyrics, dumb lyrics. I can never put my finger on what I like about them.

When it comes down to it, glam rock was all very amusing. At the time, it was funny, then a few years later it became sort of serious-looking and a bit foreboding.

My funny speech wasn't funny. That's not the first time a politician has done that.

Height is a funny thing in tennis because it definitely helps the serve, but it can hinder agility and movement. I think I have to spend a lot more time working on movement and flexibility than some of my shorter colleagues.

It's funny, the power of music. I was watching 'Dracula,' the 1931 version with Bela Lugosi, and the only music you hear is at the very beginning of the credits. There's not one other piece of music; it's all silent. It's unbelievable, and it's very effective, too.

People don't want to listen to a celebrity tweeting about their charities and shows. That's why comedy writers do well - we put out little funny ideas.