I did a character called Captain Q for Nestle's Quik. Those commercials were kind of funny.

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.

A lot of my stories about the old days, they're delicious and funny. But every time I recall the early days, it's painful. With every anecdote, it's painful because you're summoning up the terribly, terribly difficult life of my parents. And it's painful because I didn't realize at the time how hard it was for them.

Yes, we do defend our office as we do defend our homes. This is a constitutional right everybody has, and nothing's funny about that. The only reason they get mad at the Black Panther Party when you do it is for the simple reason that we're political.

I like Ben Stein. I think he's funny, creative, and an insightful commentator on a host of issues.

It's much better to wreak havoc on a show and be a maniac than promote myself. Plugs and anecdotes aren't really in line with my beliefs. Besides, if someone sees me on a morning show and thinks, 'That's not funny; this guy is crazy,' then I don't want them to come to the show anyway.

Sometimes I think I'm funny. But then sometimes I see myself, and I think, 'There's somebody trying to be funny.'

My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.

I'm not a naturally funny person, and I also can't dance, so I feel like I'm lacking the key things that you need to make a good Tik Tok video.

What is scary to me is silly to somebody else. CG isn't scary to me. It's like comedy - comedy and horror are quite similar, in that there'll always be somebody who'll say, 'I don't think that was funny.' And it's the same with things that are meant to be scary.